Ever have a New Year resolution you didn’t follow-through on? You’re not alone! “Resolutions” seem to resonate less and less with how people want to enter into the New Year. After all, more resolutions are broken than kept, and that doesn’t feel like a way to enter the New Year with integrity.
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Today, we talk about adventure and being devoted to it.
Adventure is essential to our evolution.
When I was a child, I would get soooo bored. I was an only child in a poor neighborhood that had so much gun violence I wasn’t even allowed to play in the front of the house because of all the drive by shootings…let alone walk to a friend’s house.
I made a promise to myself that when I grew up, I would never—ever—feel bored again.
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Self-image, at its core, is the way you see yourself. By “see” I mean how you interpret and think about yourself – not just the factual way you see yourself but also the opinion that you have of yourself.
An important concept to understand is that self-image is totally subjective. It is totally up to YOU. Your opinion about yourself. It isn’t factual.
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This episode is all about the most common ways I see people misuse thought work and mindfulness.
When I coach people on how to self-coach, I get so many clients who are confused about the difference between a) changing your life, b) changing your feelings about your life, c) truly processing your emotions from those original circumstances, even if you’ve already changed them.
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Circumstances are neutral.
Another way of saying this? Things are empty of inherent qualities.
Today, we’re digging into what a practical application of emptiness looks like in our everyday lives.
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I’m going to let you in on a golden nugget of truth that maybe you’ve never heard before: feelings are optional.
Yup, you read that right.
The ability to feel a full spectrum of contrasted, complex emotions are an inherent and integral part of the human experience – it’s what makes our species who (and what) we are.
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Humans go through life thinking that feelings happen TO us. We think, “Ugh I am so stressed out, I wish it would stop!” Oftentimes, we act so confused about where it is coming from.
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In case nobody ever told you: life is about making choices.
The ability to choose is an incredible power that we humans have, but it takes some serious skill to be able to use it wisely.
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The Buddha taught that, to be free, we need to investigate every part of our human experience with an intimate and mindful attention. This includes emotions.
Emotions aren’t “bad” in and of themselves.
It’s what we do when we feel them – the thoughts that ensue, the actions we take as a result – not the emotion itself, that often causes our suffering.
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Humans have a great capacity for communication.
Yes, animals can communicate in other ways with unique sounds (probably telepathic ways we aren’t able to tune into…), but because of our cerebral cortex, we are capable of communicating complex plans about the future, stories about the past, and lots of amazing, abstract ideas.
It’s a real evolutionary gift.
But this level of communication can also get us into a lot of trouble. We can really hurt people, or act in ways that aren’t in alignment with how we want to show up in the world – especially when we’re not being mindful.
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