This episode is all about releasing one of the most common toxic patterns many of us have (and that easily that hooks me, personally): judgment and blame.

This past week when I was on a silent retreat, as the days went by and we all got deeper into our meditation practice, I could see that people were walking really slowly…taking long pauses to enjoy the nature around us; stopping and touching the leaves of a bush and even petting it in appreciation; gazing at a wild turkey and laughing at all its sounds and attempts at impressing us with displays of their feathers, or perma-grinning up at the full moon.

This past week I went to Maui with my good friend, Angela on a bit of an informal retreat. We had an absolute blast together – not just because we share so much in common and can laugh until we almost pee ourselves, but also because we both realized what we could change and what we couldn’

In 1991, my life seemed perfect. I had just started at UCSC, my first choice for schools, not just because of the amazing reputation of the rebel professors, but also because of the ancient redwood forests and proximity to the beach – nature was important to me, and this place had it ALL.

When it comes to the practices of lovingkindness & compassion in Buddhist psychology, it’s pretty well understood that if we only practice these things, we can end up getting attached to the way we think things are supposed to be.

During a ceremony on my last meditation retreat, I looked this woman in the eyes and she was sobbing (with joy) and BAM! I started sobbing – also with joy – for how beautiful and precious the moment was. I didn’t stop, the entire ceremony. I had an immediate response to her tears of joy. And I could not reign that shizzle in. For the life of me.